Stealth


Having not read any reviews for this film yet, I can guarantee two things: one, 95% of critics will not like it, and two, they will all compare it to "Top Gun," "2001: A Space Odyssey" and maybe even "Dr. Strangelove;" because that's exactly what this movie was. Three of the world's elite fighter pilots are forced to have a fourth pilot join their team. This fourth pilot however, is a computer. This computer is faster, smarter and deadlier than all 3 of them put together. Is that a good thing? What do you think? If anything, making sure that you don't get a machine that could easily destroy you might be something to consider the next time you are shopping around for laptop deals.

      Here is why the comparisons hold water. The flying sequences are just like those in "Top Gun" but with just a little more speed and obviously better effects. The "I'll hit the brakes and he'll fly right by" scene ain't got nothing on the maneuvering these pilots (especially the computer) can do. The "2001" reference is obvious. The computer that everyone relies on goes haywire and must be stopped somehow. As for "Dr. Strangelove," I chuckled to myself when the US Naval officer (Sam Shepard) is forced with the unpleasant task of calling the Russian President to tell him that something went "hooey" and we have planes coming to bomb him. It reminded me so much of Peter Sellers' same task in "Dr. Strangelove;" but without the comedy (or the genius). I would even add in a dash of "Knight Rider" to the mix as well...just for fun.

      Was there an impressive story-line? No. Great acting? Definitely not. Creative character-development? No. Witty dialogue? Not really. Was it fun? Hell yes. I went into this movie knowing exactly what to expect - lots of action and sweet aerial acrobatics with missiles and guns. Of course it was ridiculous and completely irrelevant, but that's what a summer popcorn movie is all about! I walked into a dark, air-conditioned theater with an icy Coke and a huge bag of popcorn greased down with loads of chemical flavored butter, and I walked out with a big smile. Ignoring all laws of physics is what movie like this should be.

      So, try not to laugh - at me or the "actors." I liked it. Now, I'm not going to sit here and tell you it was the greatest thing ever; it wasn't. I just had fun, and for me, that is worth the $4 matinee price and escaping the 90 degree heat for a couple of hours. I can see why most will think this is quite possibly the dumbest thing to hit theaters this summer, and I won't recommend it to many, but for those of you just looking for some preposterous movie action, check out "Stealth." It will only be half as good on DVD (unless you have a state of the art home theater - and I mean state-of-the-art), so see it while it's still in theaters if you can. If you ignore the piss poor dialogue and ludicrous (therefore boring) "relationship" moments, you may find that you actually enjoyed an intense ride into un-realistic future. Speaking as a guy of my generation...it was pretty frickin' sweet.


Links:
Before even thinking about seeing this movie, view the trailer (in Quicktime) so you know what you're in for.
Here's the official site of the movie.


P.S. - I just read a couple reviews and they made me laugh...out loud! Here is a good excerpt from the New York Times' MANOHLA DARGIS:

     "The sight of Jessica Biel wiggling her shapely rear through the North Korean backcountry in the action flick "Stealth" isn't the most ludicrous image of our current movie season, but it comes close. As it happens, the most preposterous moment in this preposterous crypto-video game occurs after Ms. Biel's character, a United States naval pilot, parachutes from her stealth aircraft through a hailstorm of fiery debris, races across North Korea while chased by thugs with guns, and rushes into the arms of the man who risks worldwide nuclear holocaust to rescue her. Thanks, dude!"


My thoughts on this? Exactly!









drewbacca@moviepatron.com